INCENSE.

For Christmas, my mom bought me an incense burner and some incense. I don't know where she got the incense- It's two different kinds, one is just pure frankincense, and the other is a mixture of gums with rose oil- very nice. The burner, however, is just a regular brass-plated burner that you can usually buy from the Muslim shops on 52nd street in West Philly. It's nice though- it comes on three chains with a heavy base for setting it on furniture,and there are little cross-shaped holes in it.

King Jesu Hath a Garden!

Full of divers flowers.

DRAGON AGE.

My mom got my brother this game for Christmas. At first, I like it because it's similar to to the Fable series, except that your actions are'nt grouped into a single series. All the members of your group have differing approval ratings. I like that. And the battle system is better.

BUT,

some things in the game are a little unwholesome, which I do not like. While even in the Fable series, there has always been an option to have a wife and kids, and have a family, Dragon age took the idea of having a partner and ran with it. You should get the idea. I think that's a little disturbing. But then, I don't really know enough about the game to know how that might affect gameplay. I do know that approval ratings affect your party, including how close you are to one another, but I don't know how that affects how the plot or game goes.

[/shamelessly playing video games while on vacation.]

The Holy Innocents.

Coventry Carol.

Festal Music.

Prelude and Fugue in e-flat Major, (St.Anne) BWV 552.

I love this fugue to death. We only get it on festivals as the postlude over at Lourdes, but it's wonderfully and intricately written. (Three themes, the third theme comes from part of a theme from the prelude, and during each theme, one of the other themes also plays. Listen carefully or you'll miss them.)

On the feast of Stephen.

Carol.

Merry Christmas!

Well, it's been tiring.

At mass, we had the music as planned (hark the herald ( with fanfare and descant by Willcocks) Haydn mass in b flat, Chanted propers, Adeste fideles (Descant by Willcocks) and as the postlude, Toccata in G major.( Theodore Dubois, with the 32' reeds in the pedal and chamades in the manuals.)

For the first time ever, I did'nt go to the mass of Christmas day, and breaking the rules, I sang lauds when I got home from mass. Brunch with my mom and brother was later, and then presents. My brother and I made a trip downtown to get my mother certain type of necklace that she had wanted since we were little ones. Cue emotional hug. I helped make christmas dinner, but dessert was all storebought. (Candy cane ice cream, raspberry sorbet, and various cookies, all from Trader Joes.)

Then, I sang lauds again this morning, and after mass at Lourdes, another brunch.Then a trip in the snow to get some boots, since neither my brother or I have any boots.Yes. In a blizzard. We LEFT THE HOUSE.

Adam Lay Ybounden.

"Deus, qui hominem delapsum in mortem conspiciens, Unigeniti tui adventu redimere voluisti: praesta, quaesumus, ut qui humili eius incarnationem devotione fatentur,ipsius etiam Redemptoris consortia mereantur."

O God, who beholding man fallen into death, didst will to redeem him by the coming of thine only-Begotten: grant us, we pray thee, that as we profess his Incarnation with humility and devotion,we may likewise merit the fellowship the very same Redeemer."

Adam Lay Ybounden.

I'M DONE.

It only took me a week, but I've finished the booklet I needed to make for Christmastide. Going home for Christmas means that I can, at least temporarily, go back to my old manner of saying the office. This means that I need chants for the feasts and solemnities of Christmastide,so using This Wonderful Resource, I have lauds and vespers for the vigil of Christmas, Christmas Day, The Holy Family, The Holy Innocents, St.John the Apostle, the Maternity of Mary,Epiphany, and the Baptism of the Lord.

Compline is easy since it never changes, except for the hymn during Sapientiatide and the (semi) Octave of Epiphany. (It changes form Te Lucis to Christe, Qui Splendor et Dies.)

RYOHEI SASAGAWA.

I'm planning on drawing three pictures of him. One is nearly done, the other two are only sketches. Ryohei is form the manga Reborn!, which is one of my favourites. I have'nt actually read any manga since I left. One Manga and Manga Fox no longer have manga viewable online, my subscription to Shonen Jump ran out, and I'm too poor (Obviously) To buy volumes for myself. And daily trips to the books store can't happen now that I no longer have this thing called 'free time'.

But, I can still keep up with some of my animes, even if the mangas are always ahead of the animes.

Anyway, after him, I have three pictures of Chrome (Chrome Dokuru/Mukuru Rokudo) two of Gokudera, and one of Naito. (Naito Longchamp, the weird punk guy with the weird girlfriends)

Hey Jayson WORTHLESS:

IN YOUR FACE, LOSER.

I just think it's kinda of funny how he's trying to spin this. Dude, it's about the money. We know it's about the money. You've already said off camera that it was about the money. So, uh, it's kinda late to try to make it seem like it's not about the money. Unlike you, Some People care about the team rather than the paycheck.

Unfortunately, prudence keeps me from posting everything I wanted to say about this*, but I'm at least happy that all the cliff lee memorabilia that I had at home doesn't have to stay hidden in the basement where no one can know of it.

Sapientiatide.

Tomorrow, (At least in gallican usages, e.g., Sarum) is the beginning of Sapientiatide. In the Roman rite, the office does'nt begin till the 17th, but the idea is the same. Just like in lent, we have the mini-season of Passiontide just before easter, lasting more than a week, so we also have the nine days of Sapientide. Just as in Passiontide, we were meant to focus on the coming days of the Passion of the Lord and the mystery of the resurrection, so also, in Spaientide, our focus changes from our Advent penances to the coming mysteries of the birth and manifestation of the Lord.(And in the middle ages, Advent as part of St.Martin's lent, a fast beginning from the feast of St.Martin of Tours till Christmas. Ancient Mercedarian usage followed this.)

How annoying.

At home, my mother is preparing a room for me to stay in for Christmas. I asked her to get me a medium sized table to use as a home altar. Well, she did, but it's four inches shorter and three inches wider than my old one.

That's not a problem,right?

RONG.*

Because, you see, being the nerd that I am, for my home altar, I had frontals in all the liturgical colors for it. (I've already shown the Red, Violet, and Rose ones) Besides those, I had two green ones, three white, two gold, one black and another red. Even though I'll only be home there during the summer, I'll still probably need to use several of them while I'm home. But, if the altar does'nt FIT them , you must acqui- I mean,I'll have to alter them. (Pun 100% intended)

Which is'nt easy. All of them are made from fabric remnants, so I don't have any extra fabric to widen them. So I don't know how I'll fix them. And some, (Like the rose one) were already too short anyway.

And now,

Some appropriate Advent music.

Advent devotions.

Not trying to show off or anything, but I thought I'd post my advent devotions: (Usually done right before I go to sleep at night.)

Prayer "Per signum crucis"
Advent litany to Christ.
Reading from "Jesus, The Model of Religious"
Prayer to the Holy Ghost.
Scripture reading (From Isaiah. I should be on chapter 18 by now, but I'm lazy so I'm only on chapter 10.)

St.Andrew Christmas Novena prayer. "Hail and Blessed, etc."

An Advent Litany to Christ.

From Sacred Scripture.

CONGESTION.

There's nothing like getting bronchitis just before Christmas when you sing in a choir. I mean,to be fair, we are only doing a Simple Mass setting, With One or Two simple motets, Nothing like polyphonic motets or a choral/orchestral mass setting.

OH WAIT, I FORGOT-

THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT I HAVE TO SING. WHEN I CAN BARELY TALK. OR SING AT FULL VOICE. OR HOLD A NOTE. D:

An Advent Collect.

Excita, Domina, corda nostra ad praeparandas Unigeniti tui vias,ut, per eius adventum,purificatis tibi mentibus servire mereamur

Rouse, O Lord, our hearts to prepare the way for thine Only-Begotten, so that, by his coming, we might merit to serve thee with purified minds.

Collect of Thursday, Advent, Week II.

The Immaculate Conception.

O Dawn, sweet herald of that Sun
Whose day salvation's course doth run;
Plead Thou, we pray, O Maid of light,
That we may brave the soul's dark night.

As once the Ark of God, in peace
Made Jordan's angry waves to cease,
Which else had whelmed the passers-through;
So bring to man God's peace anew.

As wet the fleece and dry the ground,
Or dry the fleece with dew all 'round,
Like Thee, kept free of earth's control;
Pray God for every earh-bound soul.

As, when the dragon reared his head
To belch abroad his poison dread,
Him Thou didst crush beneath Thy feet;
Sure victory for us entreat.

O Mother kind, look on our tears;
Regard our struggles, prayers, and fears;
Thou who by grace didst conquer hell,
Aid us its power to repel.


All honour, laud, and glory be,
O Jesu, Virgin-born, to Thee;
Whom with the Father we adore,
And Holy Ghost, for evermore. Amen.

Hymn,Lauds.

V.I will magnify thee,O Lord, for thou hast set me up.
R. And not made my enemies to triumph over me.

Collect of the day:

O God, Who in the foreknowledge of Thy Son's most precious death didst consecrate for Him a dwelling place by the spotless Conception of the Blessed Virgin : mercifully grant that She Who was preserved from all defilement may evermore pray for us until we attain unto Thee in purity of heart. Through the same Christ our Lord. Amen.

And now, Tota Pulchra Es Maria.- Maurice Durufle.

And now,

A non-advent hymn.

I like this tune better than Terry's, but Terry's is the only you can find in print in the U.S.

Another version.

Once again, I am reminded...

...That there is a lot of creepy and disgusting 'artwork' on deviant art. I'm subscribed to Marker Mania, so every few days, I get sent the new art that they have accepted from their members to put in the members' gallery. At least 40% of the stuff I end up deleting because, no matter how well done it is, some of the work is inappropriate.

The same happens when I look for stock.

I still run an artshop on Gaiaonline, so when I take a commission to draw a person for a user, I usually look for stock with a pose that will work with what they want done. Sometimes It's easy, sometimes it's not. I really absolutely Hate looking for stock photos, because what Deviantart considers 'tasteful' and what I consider 'tasteful' are two totally different tastefuls. Depending on the user, some people do upload normal and tasteful pictures of people, objects, and backgrounds that I can use. Others upload things that can be pretty offensive. One person I came across even had a series of photos mocking the Blessed Virgin.

But you never know what you'll get till you click 'Gallery' on their profile. It's always hit or miss, and for the most part, you'll find yourself having to slag through a few pages of unsuitable work to find the real gold, Because, unfortunately, the best stock photographers often tend to do that sort of work because it brings them pageviews, which are the nectar of life on Deviantart.

I'm slowly building up a collection of people whose galleries I know are tame. But it's only four people so far.

ETA: And as proof of this, I was on DA randomly browsing, and after I clicked on Daily deviations, wallpaper and channels, I decided to click 'Collections', since I've never done that before. And I'm so happy that my account settings block mature content.

And now,

Some Advent Music.

A New Name.

I really love the theology of picking a new name in religion. Even though I don't have to do it, I do want to pick a new name, for various reasons. Some are pragmatic: The man whose name I share wasn't a saint and doesn't have a feast day, so I have no patron as my name and no name day. No one can pronounce it, no one can spell it and hardly anyone knows who the guy was. Some are spiritual. The religious life is supposed to be a taste of heaven for us. Our lord said to St. John that to those who persevere, he would give a new name when they arrived in heaven. The religious life is our heaven on earth, difficult as it may be,since for those who are called, it fits us for heaven. So we ought to receive a new name.

It represents in a concrete way the giving up of family ties that Our Lord commands in the gospel, and it represents the subjection of oneself to Christ, and the will to lose oneself that Christ may be present. We become less of us so that he may be more and more present in us, which is the essence of sanctity. And sanctity and union with God is the goal of the religious life.

So those are some of the reasons. It is of course, far too early along for my to be seriously thinking of the name I would like and asking for permission to have it, but I do wounder what I could chose. None of the saints I like have names that I can actually choose. I like St.Pius V, since he did in essence what the king whose name I share did. But Pius as a name sounds too pretentious. For my other choices, there are priests and brothers with the name in the community already, so that's not going to happen. I could probably do Louis, Augustine, Bernard, Cyprian, Denis, Ambrose, Edward, or Nicholas. Boniface, Clement, Aelred, Paschal,Fidelis, Irenaeus, and Cuthbert are probably off limits.

But we'll see what I can come up with.

And now,

An Advent Hymn.

Oh yes, I nearly forgot.

THIS:


“Hail and blessed be the hour and the moment when the Son of God was born
of the most pure Virgin Mary, at midnight, in a stable, in Bethlehem, in the piercing cold. In that hour vouchsafe, O my God, to hear my prayer and grant my desires,through the merits of Our Savior Jesus Christ,and of His Blessed Mother. Amen."

You're all a day late, and it probably won't work now, but say this 15 times a day until Christmas day as a novena. It's indulgenced, and it's a great means of preparing oneself.

An Anglican in the Catholic Church.

I think I've realised something that I've been attempting to hide from myself for quite a while: There there is a whole lot of stuff that I brought with me when I left the Episcopal church for Rome. This doesn't mean that I'm some sort of crypto-protestant who secretly doesn't believe what the church teaches or anything like this. To be honest, there was'nt anything in the catechism, whether it be papal authority or the infallibility of the church, or life or moral issues that I didn't already accept back then.

But, there is a world of difference between being an anglo-catholic and a moderately traditional Roman Catholic. Sometimes it's just little things, like the wording of the apostles ' creed, the way one says the rosary, one's private devotions or things like what one does when attending mass or the office. There are things that I did then (And some of them I kept doing and still do) that I can't do now when with other Catholics. Those things simply will need to fall by the wayside and die.

There is also a kind of 'ethos' that is'nt present here. It's not something I can really put my finger on or describe adequately, but there is a way of seeing the church and her liturgy and prayer that often is hard to find here in Rome, but can easily be found there. I would say maybe it's continuity. It's obvious to anyone that the great shift that happened in the church after the Second Vatican Council (Even though the council itself did not mandate nor even remotely envision it) really ruptured the faith as most Catholics practiced it. Seemingly overnight, everything that was 'Catholic' in the minds of the faithful disappeared. There had been in parishes a long continuous line, where the same masses were said daily, with the same vestments and in the same manner. The same music was used. The same prayers and devotions were offered by the clergy for the building up of people's faith. There were societies in parishes that had existed for 100 or more years. A man could know that he was in a pew that 100 or so years ago, another man had knelt in, hearing the same words he heard and praying the same words he prayed. And nowadays, with the focus on novelty, that just doesn't exist anymore.

Nowadays, most people would have to admit that the Catholic from 1910 would be scandalised were he to walk into his parish church as it exists now and see what it has become. Thankfully, in many places there is a growing movement to restore this 'ethos' of continuity that we lost. But it was in this ethos that I first learned the Catholic faith, as a non-Catholic, and it was hard seeing that for the most part, this has been rejected. That's the interior disposition.

But the exterior is also not the same. Leaving for the pastures of Rome also meant leaving just about every external thing that I associated with the catholic faith as I understood it and practiced it: Boychoirs and processions, the daily office, Cranmer's English and Coverdale's psalms, anglo-catholic tracts and devotionals, and of course, the congregational hymn, among other things. It might seem like trivial things, but when one associates these things with Catholicism, it's painful to be told that such-or-such a thing is 'Not Catholic'.

While it's true that Catholicism doesn't require a monolithic uniformity in all things, it's obvious that you can't just bring in everything.I do wonder if there is the possibility of a median way where one is allowed to preserve the good things received from non-catholic churches without, in a sense, acting as if one never left. Now, don't anyone get crazy and think that I'm having some sort of crisis in faith or anything. I've just been wondering if, among the many rites and many ways of expressing the one true Catholic faith, if my old way is something that I really need to completely reject and deprecate at every moment.

And now, because you guys knew that I was going to post it anyway:

[Link]

And also,

I forgot to say that I apparently have bronchitis and have had it for the past two weeks.

That is all.

Coming to terms.

With life. It's not easy. It's really hard knowing that this past year is the last of almost everything. The last Christmas and Thanksgiving I'll ever spend with my family, the last of birthday parties, the last of personal possessions. Within a few months, novitiate will start, and I'll have nothing but God. Everything I own will be gone, and to some extent, family ties will have to loosen a bit.

And this isn't at all easy.

It's not helped by the fact that none of my family is Catholic. Monasteries and friars and seminaries, and habit and novitiate years and the Three Holy Vows, none of these things have any meaning to them. I think I could take it all a bit better if they understood, but they don't and I can't seem to help. I suppose in a sense, It's only harder for me because I know it's hard for them. But it's not in my hands, it's in God's. I'll just do my part and offer as many rosaries for this intention as I can, and hope that come Christmas, it'll all make more sense for them.