Friday, May 15, 2009

I'M GOING TO DIE!

(This is where Joe was going to post a photograph of Paronychia, only it's so rank and disgusting that he could'nt do it. Google at your own risk.)

MAYBE! Or, I could lose the toe. You see, Joe here is one of the 40% of Americans who is unable to take pills. Yes, I finally admited it. I buy children's Tylenol and crush my allergy medicines up in orange juice and Jell-o.

 I really tried.

For ten minutes every time since I got the medicine, I've tried but it just does'nt work. Nevermind the fact that I know that there are certain foods that I eat mostly whole (mini-M&M's for example.) It does'nt work. Years of mom's scolding that I neede to teach myself the heimlich for when I inevitably start choking on some candy or something and no one's around, along with constant stories of near-choking experiences scarred me. Mentally. Like, in the mind and stuff. So I't just does'nt ork. I'd try the thing with soda, but my parents have'nt bought soda in nine years. I'm not even suppossed to drink it.* Let's hope the topical anti-biotics keep the infection down util re-re Joe figures out how to take pills. Now I'm practicing with frozen strawberries. I already downed three in a row.

18 years old and he still has mommy crush up his tablets in yougurt. What is he, stupid or something?

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